The nurse practitioner wanted me to call her today to let her know how our "experiment" with the xanax worked. It didn't! I really had no intention of taking any but last night my heart was racing so fast I could not go to sleep. I was anxious and I would have never fallen asleep. Eventually I took a half of one because I didn't want to take the whole thing but about 30 minutes later (well past midnight at this point) took the rest because nothing was happening. Shortly after I took the other half I started to get tired but the heart kept racing. The experiment was to see if the xanax would stop the racing heart but it failed to.
I was disappointed because I was really hoping it was just some anxiety and nothing else. I'm still not convinced that isn't what it is or that it's not just something that will go away soon once I start eating or get a little better, or.....something.
I just did an internet search and it does say that liquid diets can affect the concentration of electrolytes in the bloodstream which can cause problems with the heart's electrical system. This could explain it but it could be a number of different things so who knows.
I won't know anything today because I didn't get a call back until I had left for the afternoon and now it's after closing time. I'm not too broken up about it because I kind of wanted to give it another night and see what happens.
On the upside I joined the land of the living today. I went to Madison's parent/teacher conference (which was wonderful, by the way), picked up Kennedy from preschool, went to the library where they happened to be having a Girl Scouts meeting and Madison decided she wanted to give it another try (and she absolutely loved it), sat and chatted with my friend for the hour. I am paying the price for the hour of chatting, my throat is hurting but it was nice to feel normal again for a bit.
If it weren't for this heart thing I would really be starting to feel confident in my recovery at this point. Here's to hoping I have a good night.
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